Limpia, fija y da Esplendor.

So here I sit.

11:47pm CST at
[N 33.20226°]
[W 87.54724°]


Taking a break from studying calculus because I literally have a headache. And I'm probably gonna be up all night which means I still have about 12 hours before I have to start panicking. I'm not sure why I hate this calculus class so much, or why I'm having such a difficult time with it. I understand all the concepts fairly well, but understanding how to work out each problem just seems to escape me. And this is hardly the hardest class I'm going to have in the next 6 years. I think I have such an aversion to this class because
1) It's a summer class. Who want's to spend 5 hours a week staring at a 65 year old woman writing out formulas?
2)I've been partially clinically diagnosed with ADHD. Which I've put off (ironically) seeing a psychologist about, to get drugs or at least therapy.
3)It's math!
4)It's math that feels mostly irrelevant! (I loved learning about radiometric dating, because it's practical. Most everything else hasn't been.)
5)I'm technically not even supposed to be in the class (I've managed to loophole the pre-req system it seems, by taking it at Shelton.)

I know. I'm whining, and procrastinating at the same time, which is going to make me hate the class even more, when I have to drop out because otherwise I'm going to fail.

I just wanted to issue my list of grievances. I'm like a colonist making my foray into the brave new world of art students deciding they want to be doctors. Not that I'm the first...but you get the metaphor. Tyrant King Science doesn't like me very much, but I will have my revolution. Oh I will. Give me an MD or give me death! We will overcome! I have a dream! Viva la revolution!


NOTE: I had an Albert Einstein quote below until I read this one. It (obviously) is quite similar to Benjamin Button, which I didn't really care for, but in a much happier, more profound way. Maybe we do have it all wrong?

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“The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating...





...and you finish off as an orgasm.” - George Carlin